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The Expectant Father
Facts, Tips and Advice for Fathers-To-Be
by Armin A. Brott and Jennifer Ash Book review Copyright © 1995 by Bert H. Hoff
Armin A. Brott and Jennifer Ash, The Expectant Father: Facts, Tips and Advice for Fathers-To-Be. (New York, NY: Abbeville Press, 1995) Order on-line
 The Expectant Father by Armin A. Brott and Jennifer Ash Order on-line
Related:
 The New Father: A Dad's Guide to the First Year Order on-line
 Throwaway Dads: The Myths and Barriers That Keep Men from Being the Fathers They Want to Be by Ross D. Parke, Armin A. Brott Review Order on-line |
In last month’s book review of David Blankenhorn’s Fatherless America: Confronting Our Most Urgent Social Problem (New York, NY: BasicBooks, 1995) (order on-line) I pointed out that this magazine has not done much to celebrate fatherhood. With Father’s Day approaching, I think it entirely appropriate that I highlight this book for new fathers. This topic is so removed from my own experience, in the distant past, that I feel like a priest giving sex counseling. Nevertheless, I recommend it.
It is a wonderful book. Its pleasing format invites you into the text, and its cartoons help you keep a sense of humor about the process. It has practical hints of advice about what childbirth classes don’t tell you, financial issues, and all the other things that come up. It affirms and empowers expectant fathers by recognizing what the man is going through. For example, issues arise around sex. Some men are repulsed by a pregnant wife, but others find the woman more sexually appealing than ever before. Whichever way you feel, the book assures you that these feeling are natural and you are normal. I asked my wife, Bernetta, to look at the book. Her comments: "I recommend it. I’ve never seen a book describe for a man what a woman goes through physically and emotionally during pregnancy. Or what the baby is going through. I wish we had had this book when I was pregnant. There have been books like this for women. It’s about time someone wrote a book like this for men. Men need to be involved."
I found the concluding sections especially male-positive, especially in light of Mr. Blankenhorn’s book. The book warns the fathers about, and prepares them for, a society which does not seem to honor fatherhood. The authors point out the cultural messages that are delivered, for example, through fairy tales and Bambi. Many of these messages focus on the child and the mother. The father seems superfluous at best, or villainous at worst. This book blesses men by honoring and celebrating the joys of fatherhood. More importantly, the book gives practical advice on how men can support other men in being fathers.
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