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Top Ten Predictions About Women and Men

As listed in Dr. Warren Farrell's book
Women Can't Hear What Men Don't Say

© 1999 Warren Farrell
Featured on MenWeb with Warren's kind permission.

 

Warren Farrell, Women Can't Hear What Men Don't Say: Destroying Myths, Creating Love (New York, NY: Tarcher/Putnam, 1999). Order on-line Audio Cassette

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Women Can't Hear What Men Don't Say: Destroying Myths, Creating Love
by Warren Farrell
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Dr. Warren Farrell


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The Myth of Male Power
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Top Ten Predictions About Women and Men

10. Domestic Violence:
Domestic violence will slowly emerge as a two-sex issue. As the male-perpetrator assumption is questioned, the addition of shelters and hotlines for men will lead to treatment programs placing greater emphasis on prevention via communication skills. Men will gradually feel more welcome into the social work profession against.

9. Marriages of Executive Women and Multi-Option Men:
Men will more frequently seek the option of caring for the children and working out of the home, and making proportionately less money than wives who have away-from-home careers. Simultaneously, being the primary breadwinner will become a strategy for top-executive women to attain the support they need to break through the "glass ceiling." These marriages will be about average in stability, but breakups will often be high profile and establish legal precedents as to whether laws designed to protect women will also protect these men. Most of the breakups will be catalyzed by women having affairs with men they meet through work, and men complaining about being taken for granted.

8. Female Team Sports:
Female team sports will grow in popularity so that the average person will recognize the names of the heroines of female team sports (not just the heroines of individual sports like tennis, ice skating, gymnastics, swimming). Girls will play more unsupervised, unprotected team sports before and after school, sandlot style. Girls' soccer, basketball, and volleyball will make the first breakthroughs. Girls' participation in team sports will have a positive impact on girls' happiness in life, success at work and marital happiness.

7. The Lace Curtain:
Of the four major components of the Lace Curtain (media, academia, government, and helping professions), the media will lead the way in balancing their news coverage with attention to the personal stories of men and men's issues. The government and helping professions will follow suit, with universities dragging behind. It will take more than a decade for men's studies programs to focus on the real feelings of most men rather than feminist perspectives on the problems men cause. Lawsuits will initiate some of these changes in all four areas.

6. Discrimination Against Women and Its Irony:
Companies' fear of sexual harassment lawsuits, sex discrimination accusations, and demands for flexible hours, child care, and maternity leave will lead to underground discrimination against women as in-house employees, especially in low- and mid-level positions. Fear of sexual harassment lawsuits will make the mentorship of women by executive men less common. Women will be hired more as independent contractors, and on a project basis. Ironically, this discrimination against women will ultimately benefit many women who will develop new ways of looking at financial security (many clients rather than one employer), and more self-starting and risk-taking skills. Many will feel more in common with many men.

5. Discrimination Against Men:
Lawsuits will allege discrimination in hiring men as elementary school teachers, nurses, flight attendants, cocktail servers, secretaries, and receptionists. Male affirmative action will become a political issue. The pay-equity debate will reemerge, but this time with both sexes alleging discrimination. Guidelines to determine discrimination will become more complex. (this will be the subject of my book 25 Ways to Higher Pay.)

4. Protecting Women:
The legal system will confront the constitutionality of male-only draft registration, the Violence Against Women Act, the "learned helplessness" defense, the rape shield law, Women, Infant, and Children Programs, Offices of Women's Health, and other laws that protect women more than men.

3. Relationship Language and our Children:
Grammar schools will make the four "relationship language" skills (experiencing empathy; communicating empathy; giving criticism so it can be easily heard; hearing criticism so it can be easily given) part of required curriculum. Some schools will give these as much priority as computer language and teach these at the same age children learn reading. Many schools will be stimulated to provide these programs after mass shootings by teenage boys who feel rejected and unable to gain attention constructively and therefore do it destructively, often followed by suicide. When relationship language curriculum stems this tide best it will be when the curriculum also integrates male-sensitive outreach programs, and as fathers become more involved with their sons, providing a balance of nurturance and discipline.

Comment: This sounds to me more like wishful thinking than responsible forecasting.

2. A Men's Birth Control Pill:
A men's birth control pill will alter men's lives and male-female relationships almost as much as the female pill did for women: it will reduce commitment borne of women becoming pregnant without the man's agreement, and therefore reduce men's fear of commitment and increase men's trust in women; it will lead to many fewer premarital pregnancies; there will be fewer abortions; it will lead to men taking more responsibility for children; it will be used by poor men more than people believe. A men's birth control pill will sell better than Viagra.

1. Fathers:
Fathers' issues will be to the early twenty-first century what women's issues were to the late twentieth century. Fathers will have greater success obtaining joint and primary custody. Denial of "visitation" will be treated more seriously. More men will ask for paternity tests. Single dads will increasingly work out of their home and will continue to be less likely than women to receive child support, either from the mother or the government, even when he has sole custody of the children. Single dads will become between 25 and 30 percent of single parents by 2015.

Comparing Warren Farrell to Susan Faludi

Here's an article comparing Warren Farrell's writing to Susan Faludi's new book Stiffed

Book Review

Here's a book review by J. Steven Svoboda.

Book description and reviews

Here are a book description and reviews from Amazon.com

Introduction to the book

MenWeb is delighted to present the Introduction to Warren's book.

 


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